Changing moods and pretty pictures

"Your hot then your cold, you're yes then you're no, you're in then you're out, you're up then you're down..."

Pretty much everyone would recognise those lyrics from the Katy Perry song, "Hot n' Cold", or from the opening of the Australian TV version of Masterchef.  I've been pretty much like that over the last couple of days.  The boat trip is weighing on my mind and I find myself thinking about it all the time. Sometimes good thoughts, "This is going to be a terrific trip!"; and sometimes not so good...

• "What if the weather is bad!"
• "Will Mr G be kind and understanding if I get scared (he isn't always)!"
• "Will Steph be OK in the house?"
• "Will Molly be OK and how can I manage to be away from my dog for 6 months!"

Stephanie used to tell me when we were training together and often discussing my changing moods - on everything - that I was, "Batshit crazy!".  Maybe so.  I have an awful tendency to think too much.

We were on the boat 5 days last week and, I have to say, it was a good break.  I was full of good thoughts and Mr G was sweet as he can be. 

Of course all that had to change with something unexpected and scary happening to bring me back down to earth on the way back to our mooring.  We were motoring along into about 16-18 knots of wind about to round into Pittwater when I heard a strange sound like a plastic bag rustling in the wind.  Mr G was in the galley making us a cup of tea and Miss Molly and I were in the cockpit...the boat was on autopilot.  Suddenly our roll up spinnaker unfurled and the ocean in front of us was blocked out with a mass of huge red sail!  The boat lurched sideways.  I jumped to the wheel, punched the autopilot button and steered us into the wind shouting at Mr G the "thing" (at the time I couldn't form the word spinnaker) was loose.  He came running up and ran out to the front of the boat to try and tame the runaway sail.  At first he was shouting for me to turn the boat away from the wind... which wasn't practical because the force of the wind could have blown the sail out.  So, we worked together.  Me keeping us into the wind as much as possible and him wedged on the bow trying to furl the sail on is mechanism.  All came good...as usual...but then the negative thoughts came about much more wind, night sailing, ships, etc, etc.  Batshit Crazy!

Anyway, as they say in showbiz, "it'll be alright on the night" or once we get out of town and DO IT.

Here's some more pretty pics from last week on the boat.

Retirement....Ok, I admit it, this is so much better than working!

We are on the boat for a few days.  I think it was all the talk about planning the trip in earnest that sparked a real need for a 'mini' break.  Right now we're in our fav spot of Refuge Bay.  There are hardly any other boats here and the waterfall has a lot of water running.  My dear friend Donna D. called this waterfall the Fountain of Youth!....cause its so COLD.

Shows how much rain we've had - Refuge Bay waterfall is running well.

Its a magic Autumn day...temperature is around 27C and there's a nice breeze.  We sailed down here under head sail in about 8-10 knots of wind which was just enough to move nicely with no stress.  As we sat down to lunch and a cold beer I had a thought about my past life and, if I was still in the rat race, what I would be doing today - meetings, emails, phone calls, stressing about something - and a great feeling of relief washed over me.  Today, more than any day so far, I admit that retirement is much better than working!  We are very blessed to have the opportunity to spend our days like this - Thank You Universe.

Because we've had so much rain the water is a dirty brown colour - the colour of strong tea.  As we sailed down to this bay we passed an area where the Hawkesbury River collides with the ocean at the beginning of Broken Bay. The tide was running in which created a spectacular sight.  Mr G tried to take a photo of it...this is the best the camera could do....

The river meets the ocean - brown tide the river...blue the incoming ocean.

The most exciting element of this trip is our new wi-fi modum!!  For the first time - EVER - I can access the internet from here.  Normally we are in a black spot the whole time we're in the national park. 

A couple of weeks ago Mr G and I attended a communications seminar as part of a Coral Coast 2013 program at the Alfreds Yacht Club.  In the course the instructor gave the suggestion that, instead of an expensive satellite system, you can purchase a $79.00 wi-fi modum from Telstra (the major Australian phone company), add a cheap antennae and you'll get internet access in remote places.  Sure enough, It WORKS!  Being without internet for days on end - for me - is like having an arm immobilised!  No email, no blogging, no weather reports, no newspaper!  I am so thrilled with this new gadget!

Molly and Mr G are now snoring in the v-berth enjoying their afternoon nap.  I think its time for me to join them. 

Miss Molly enjoying the breeze - waiting for nap time.

FEAR be Damned!

I will be the first to admit that I'm not a confident or relaxed sailor.   Being on the boat is a lovely experience for me while sailing in a calm 15-18 knots of wind, or at anchor in a lovely little bay with a cold glass of wine in my hand.  However, bouncing along with the wind screaming in the rigging balanced precariously on the boat's side is not my most favourite thing.

In fact, to Mr G's exasperation, this is often my expression while under way...

"You said do WHAT?"  Not a pretty look!

Lots of people - friends, boat builder, acquaintances & Mr G - have asked "WHY?" did you want to build the beautiful and BIG Southern Belle if you didn't want to go sailing?  My reasons were sound -I thought - at the time...

• Mr G is boat CRAZY.  Some kind of large boat ownership was/is inevitable while our marriage exists so I wanted to make sure I was on the best and safest boat we could afford.
• If I had to endure the scary bits, as well as the fun bits, of sailing I wanted as much comfort as possible.
• And finally, and probably the most compelling of my reasons, I wanted a boat that would have a good resell value for the day - way in the future - we will have to sell.

Southern Belle under way.

So now we have a beautiful sailing yacht that fulfils all those criteria.  And we have enjoyed countless days moored in lovely little bays.  But now, the grim reality of having such a seaworthy beauty is coming to haunt me.  I've delayed it as much as possible.  My protests no longer gain me any traction with family or friends.  I can avoid it no longer.  We are actually going on a long - I mean LONG - cruise out in the ocean and away from our - MY - home!

So I'm packing up my fear, locking it securely in an air tight container and storing it way back in the recesses of my mind with a warning its not to make an appearance again....unless absolutely required.

Planning and preparation starts in earnest this week.  We're about 7 - 8 weeks away from departure.  The trip should be - no WILL BE - a terrific experience!  We'll be travelling up the coast of Australia all the way to Cairns where the plan is to join a yacht rally going for 4 weeks out to the Louisiades Islands.  A chain of islands 100 nautical miles east of PNG.  I'm hoping our friend Catherine, from the Isle of Skye, will join us for this part of the adventure.  Miss Molly will stay at home - happily - while my friend Steph and her BF move in to be mom & dad during our cruise.

So, FEAR be DAMNED! I'm determined to do this and I'm going to enjoy it!  I keep picturing myself in this lagoon...again with a cold drink and a happy expression on my face (most of the time anyway).  I'll keep blogging about the cruise plan .. and during the trip... so stay with me (and encourage me). 

On Women - Friendship, Courage, Confidence, and a Mockery of Political Debate

 

When I was a little girl I had parents that were good people.  My mother was a deeply messed up religious nutter and my father was an amazingly loving and fair man  .. both from a rural Georgia Southern Baptist background.  They instilled in me, at every chance, the golden rule.  My mother's rule was, "God loves us so we must love everybody".  My Father's rule, "be respectful to everyone, even if you don't like them".   Even though I've left religion far behind I still believe strongly in The Golden Rule - treat others as you would like to be treated.

So, in writing this post, I want to document that I have great respect for men and like them a lot ....but I LOVE women.  I love their resilience, their drive and their ability to combine a myriad of roles and abilities while doing everything at much the same time.  I'm a fan.

This week brought a lot of issues around women, in general, home to me.   So, here they are...

Friendship
Last Tuesday I had dinner with my friends from past working days ... the Dream Team.  This group of talented women combine being wives, mothers and, in most cases, business professionals.  But just as importantly they are great friends.  There to share with each other the ups and downs of living life, raising kids, retiring, or starting new jobs.  The kind of friendship that's food for the soul.

And in my post Flashback Friday - the girls I remembered 2 of the women that were mainstays during my childhood and teenage years who, along with others + my sister & BFF - Jae, have defined friendship perfectly over many many years. Again, essential for the soul.

Courage
Friday night Mr G and I went to a yacht club cruising event and the guest speaker was Kay Cottee.

If you've never heard of her - or don't exactly remember the extent of her achievements here's a blurb from her book - "First Lady".  On June 5, 1988, Kay Cottee fulfilled a childhood dream.  After covering more than 22,000 nautical miles in 189 days at sea she became the first woman in history to complete a solo, nonstop and unassisted voyage around the world.

I had read her book years ago but didn't remember a lot of the detail about her achievement.  Hearing her talk about it really brought home just how absolutely courageous she was at the time.  There was no GPS or satellite navigation.  Well, there was one - ONE - satellite circling the earth at the time.  So she had to wait for it to complete its orbit before being able to use it.
No email then either.  She had to use a telex!   Kay spoke for about 45 minutes and gave us a short, but hair raising, account of the trials at sea she encountered.  Since then she has inspired other women to push the boundaries of what society thinks they can do...Jessica Watson - the 16 year old who did it herself in 2010- was/is a big fan.  As she was welcomed home at Darling Harbour and famously asked by a female journalist, "How does it feel to have conquered a man's world?"  Kay replied, "I was brought up believing there is no such thing as a man's world or a woman's world. It's everyone's world!'

I didn't know that Kay had a successful career as a fund raiser and served on many boards and is currently the Chairman of the National Maritime Museum.  Proof that women can and do achieve anything they set their mind to do!

Confidence
The Australian Bureau of Statistics and its latest Australian Social Trends report concluded this week that "some women don't have the confidence to become boss".  No kidding!  How many organisations create a culture encouraging and enabling women to progress through the ranks?  And, how often does the media portray female norms as face and body fashion mannequins?  Sarah Le Marquand writing for The Hoopla - Get back to the kitchen. - made the point ...

It might have gone unnoticed by the ABS staff who compiled the report, but factors such as a dire undersupply of affordable childcare, entrenched sexism in certain industries, continuing lack of workplace flexibility and archaic pre-selection practices in the major political parties play far more of a role in preserving the glass ceiling than individual personality traits.

There’s no denying the tendency for women to downplay their achievements and a reluctance to talk themselves up is a contributing factor in their failure to dominate the boardroom.

But these are factors overwhelming eclipsed by the practical concerns and genuine barriers women still face in the workplace. And no amount of glib platitudes about confidence will change that.

Here, here! 

Mockery of Political Debate
Ann Summers wrote another scathing article about the media's journalists, shock jocks and others who peddle rumours and negative assumptions about our Prime Minister, Julia Gilliard.  She says, "as a result, they feel no obligation to respect the person, let alone the office of Prime Minister, since in their minds she is already gone."

Under fire ... Julia Gillard. Photo: Mark Graham

Read more: http://www.smh.com.au/opinion/politics/pms-critics-make-a-mockery-of-political-debate-20130301-2fbi7.html#ixzz2MSBiaVlR

It seems there is no amount of vilification too good to spew at the PM.  There isn't one member of the media willing to write a headline or produce a story that doesn't have a negative bias. 

Which comes right back to the golden rule.

 

Really, is this what we want in our politics?  To not give a damn about the facts?  I give a damn and I don't see the opposition or the opposition leader offering anything but negativity and backward ideas.  Better to open our eyes between now and the election in September and demand the real facts and issues or be just as disillusioned all over again.

 

FLASHBACK FRIDAY - Strange and Wonderful Friends .. The Girls

Continuing the trip back in time to the halcyon days of the 70s ... here's a look at 2 of my loooong term friends and FUN women of that time.


Jae, me, Phyllis (fearless) and Glo

I love this picture.  These girls were so much a part of my life from a very early age.

Glo -short for Gloria - was my childhood best friend.  She lived across the street and her family was as different to mine as day is to night.  I was an only child with "older", very religious, parents.  We had a relatively quiet life.  Glo on the other hand had, what seemed like to me, herds of siblings....4 or 5 if I remember rightly.  Her house was always chaotic and loud. 

We were BFFs for sure.  Spending every weekend sleeping over, going to school together, riding our bikes and generally being kids.  Sleepovers used to drive my dad crazy....we would talk and giggle way into the night.  More than once he would threatened to, "break us up! Someone was sleeping on the couch!"  Unfulfilled threats.  He never did it and we never stopped giggling.  When I was just about to start high school my family moved but that didn't stop us being best friends.  We spent every weekend together.  When we were older - 16/17 - we started to go to a club just for teenagers called the Electric Eye.  Great place.  Black lights, psychedelic music and BOYS!  So much fun dancing and making out in the parking lot with that special guy (at least for that week) .. we had a blast.

Glo met her, at the time, love of her life there.  I remember at the local pool one afternoon, after she and David had been going 'steady' for months, she told me they had 'done it'!  I was so sheltered I drove her crazy for weeks wanting to find out every detail!  It took a lot longer for me to shake off my Christian roots and jump in - so to speak.

David was drafted not long after high school and sent to Viet Nam.  He didn't come back physically injured but he wasn't the same man afterwards.  They got married, bought a big red setter dog and moved into an apartment down the street from Jae and me.  It didn't last.  The war changed David too much.  Glo got a divorce and later married someone else and moved away from Atlanta.  I moved to the other side of the world and we lost touch....forever it seems.  I hope she's still happy.  I would so much love to see her again.

Glo, David and their big red dog.

I met Phyllis in high school.  I clearly remember being aware of her from the school girls lavatory.  She was always fussing with her hair and one day she just threw her brush across the room!  That enticed  me talk to her, "what's the matter?", and after that we became friends.  Phyllis was crazy about the Beatles and we would sit in her basement room and listen to them over and over and over again - blasting out through her little record player.  We both had fan posters all over our bedroom walls.  My Beatles posters, of course, held a second position to the Rolling Stones.  Mick Jagger always ruled my girlie fantasies!

We stayed good friends through the post high school years and then moved into our hippy like years together. I got drunk for the first time with Phyllis.  She had an older brother that bought a little bottle of rum for us...we drank it with coke in her room.  Yuck.  I remember singing and jumping on her bed and then puking my guts up for the rest of the night.  Haven't touched rum since.  I think I was with Phyllis when I first smoked pot as well!  Phyllis met Jae, they became good friends and eventually moved in to share the little Marlbrook 'castle'.



Fearless Phyllis



Phyllis earned the name 'Fearless' because she simply was unstoppable.  She had a wild brave streak that could be, at times, a bit scary.  But a lot of fun too.  Phyllis' fell in love with a great guy - Jerry.  He was the room mate of a boyfriend of mine.  They were a terrific couple.  And, of course, they moved in across the street from Jae and me on Marlbrook.

Lovely couple!

The day Phyllis and Jerry left for Detroit.....not a happy day.

 

Jerry was from Detroit and he and Phyllis moved up there to be closer to his family and find work.  Not long after they moved Jerry was killed in a horrible factory accident.  Jae and I flew up to Detroit to be with Phyllis and stayed with the family until the funeral.  God that was an awful time.  Phyllis married again much later .. he died too from MS.  For such an infectious and fun loving woman she's had a rough rough life.  I saw her late last year in Atlanta.  Right now she seems to have found solace in religion.  I sincerely hope she finds peace and love again very soon.

That's just two of the girls to women I've had the fortune to share my life with.  There are so many more great women I haven't even begun to mention yet!!!   And so many more stories! 

We had good and bad times together and it's fun looking back.  If we all had a crystal ball back then to tell us where we would be today and how we would change, grow up to be so much older and find personal growth plus happiness as well as suffer loss and hardship ....  Would we have changed a thing?  Maybe some things - certainly no one would have chosen to lose Jerry - other things...I think not.

More flashbacks next Friday.

A particularly ugly morning after.

The girls - and our friend Ellen - helping Phyllis move into her apartment across the street.

Jae, Jerry, me, Phyllis and our friend Amy in the little kitchette at Marlbrook.  Happy times.

 

Precipice of time, valley of life...and Dream Team

Warning:  Amateur philosophy ahead!

The girls from dinner last night...shame the camera made us all look like we were from the Village of the Damned!

Last night after a lovely dinner with wonderful and beautiful friends I came home still smiling to myself.  Time with friends goes so fast but it excels in enriching the soul!  Don't you think?  I made a cup of Sleepy Time Tea, had a good cuddle with Miss Molly on the sofa - Mr G was sound asleep - and experienced a kind of epiphany.  I started thinking about my life and came up with this scenario....

Age is like climbing up a mountain; sometimes steep, sometimes easy, and sometimes so tough it seems like you can't hang on any longer.  But with each climb opportunities arise to take a break.  The climb levels out, you get a chance to stand on a precipice and look down at the valley of life to clearly see where you've been and how you got to this point.  

From this overlooking ledge there's an opportunity to stop a minute and take stock....has the climb been worth it, have the decisions been OK, have you been kind and respected others and the animals and the ecosystem...have you been lucky to surround yourself with the people you need for love, support and enrichment?

Too deep?  Sorry.  But I felt very philosophical last night...and the feeling is still with me today.

So what did I see when I looked down from that ledge at the valley of my life.  I saw that I've been so very very blessed in everything!  Great friends in the USA and here, a long and good marriage with a lovely husband, a chance to move to Australia, health, an opportunity to have a career and, so far, a happy retirement.  WOW, so much good stuff!  Today I've probably told the Universe thank you a million times.  THANK YOU again.... I am GRATEFUL!

So what prompted this deep look at life?  It was the women friends I had dinner with.  They are part of my past ... a  Dream Team of workmates over many years.  A group of very talented women and - our 1 man - who endured the fast paced manic nature of business at Fox Home Entertainment to become great friends.  There were many missing at last night's dinner.  Everyone has children, busy working lives and many demands on their time so its hard to get everyone together.  But a few times each year we try to make it to see each other, laugh a lot and report on our lives.

We met over almost a quarter of a century....from 1983 to 2007 when I left Fox.... and, in many ways, we grew up together both professionally and personally.  Even if we don't see or speak to each other for months it doesn't even take a second to jump straight into the VIBE.  Last night was no exception.  It made me smile to see that within minutes everyone was talking & laughing...across the table, diagonally across each other ... in 2s and 3s and then altogether.  Fantastic! 

This is what I mean by blessed.  I am so lucky to have this group of smart beautiful women in my life...along with all my other friends .. its an honour to be here and share bits of my life with them.  I'll say it again...THANK YOU UNIVERSE!  And thank you Dream Team....I love our times together so much.

Boomer home alone with her thoughts ... a 'sort of' rant

Mr. G got up this morning with a bee in his bonnet.  He HAD to go to the boat to do stuff.  Now "stuff" often consists of a bit of tinkering here and a bit there, a little lunch and a nice lie down on the gently rocking boat for extended nap time.  I am being dismissive here (sorry, Mr G).  He does a lot of maintenance on his boat alone days...things that I - thankfully - don't have to do.  Like oil changing, sanding and varnishing and general stuff like that.  Let me say right here and now...THANK YOU MR G!  And, just a little thanks for a day to myself as well...nice.

So, what to do.

I started out with the girlie upkeep things...did my nails, washed my hair, put on fake tan, etc., etc.  Duties that, at my age, seem all that more important because, with every job, you're working on holding back the years - as best as can be done.

Then I sat down to read my two favourite online resources... The Hoopla and Sydney Morning Herald.  Let me say, as loudly as possible, right here right now - I LOVE THE HOOPLA!!!!  If you haven't discovered it yet please do.  Here, let me give you the link right now... The Hoopla - Stay in the Loop .  Subscribe to the daily newsletter, for me it provides some kind of solace from the usual news crap instead of wanting to scream at the computer screen or TV.

In the constant barrage from the 24 hour news cycle these independent writers - mostly women - appear to me to be the only sane voice out there spruking the news.   Take today for example.  The morning programs --- especially Chanel 9's Today show, which is unashamedly pro Tony Abbott, and against the government - and the Murdoch papers --- were shouting about another "disastrous" poll for the government.  But The Hoopla's Corinne Grant wrote a marvellous common sense article in which the polls were just one of several areas in her Rage Index.   Her quote was the best I've ever read about political polls...

"Unless you decide who to vote for based on who other people vote for and not on what is best for you, there’s not much point paying polls any attention."

Amen.  Here's a link to the whole article Corinne Grant's Rage Index  and also, while I'm at it, here's another great article by her relating to our upcoming election in September Policy and Crap Guide

I didn't fare as well enjoying the Sydney Morning Herald.  Too much opinion about the Oscars.  Hey, it's a show celebrating Hollywood.  What do you expect... End of story.  Of course there were the obligatory stories about fallen sports start - which seems to be de rigueur these days.   And then articles about the opposition and what they will do when in power.  Talk about counting your chickens before they hatch.

I got hot under the collar when I read that Joe Hockey, Abbott's right hand attack dog (I can hardly stand to type either man's name...they are so despicable to me), has raised the possibility of compensating big companies for any costs if they are under way with refits to compensate for their carbon emissions. WTF!   Compensation for carbon refits.

Science, citizens and governments, all over the world, know that to ensure the Earth is sustainable for future generations we must make some changes to what we do NOW.   Even China is waking up to the fact that they can't keep building power plants with no regard for the environment.  So our illustrious opposition leaders can't wait to abolish the carbon tax - which is flawed but politically and environmentally a good start - and they're going to pay polluters to go back to the way they used to go about their business!  This is CRAZY!!!

Mahatma Gandhi once said, "The future depends on what we do in the present."  Somebody - lots of somebodys - need to remind our political parties of this.

Enough ranting for one day.  Time for a cup of tea.