Random Acts of Kindness

Image from PenandBell.com

My friend MJ has a terrific blog about raising her daughter - BumpyRoadtoBubba - and in it she mentions random acts of kindness and how she tries to do them as often as possible.  I agree with the endeavour but inevitably wait for the opportunity instead of just doing it...which is the true test of being random.

 

This afternoon I was offered the perfect chance to put myself out there and do something totally unexpected.  I was leaving 'Sam, The  Cake Man's' shop - which by the way has the BEST pastries on the North Shore - and rain had just started to come down hard.  My trip across the parking lot wasn't going to present a problem because I had the foresight to carry my umbrella.  As I came out of the shop I noticed this young woman standing under the building overhang.  She looked worried and was checking her watch and looking out at the rain pounding the expansive parking lot.  There I was with my bags of shopping in hand and my rather large umbrella - safe - with not too far to go.  I thought, "I should see if I can help, maybe she's going my way".  So I walked up and offered to shelter her to her car.  Wow, she looked surprised!  "Are you sure?"  "Yes, come on let's go".

Off we walked through the driving rain huddled under my umbrella.  We passed my car, then passed the middle of the car park and kept on walking.  She was lovely, talked about her kids and how much she appreciated my help....and we kept walking.  Finally with the rain now pelting down and almost to the end of the car park we came to her car.  She said another heartfelt thanks and asked, "which car is yours?".  I said, "Oh, its just back a piece".

 

I turned and started back to my car which was up near the shop and the rain got heavier.  At one point a gust of wind caught the umbrella, whipped it back from my hands, dumped water all over my back and left me standing there in the driving rain.  Stunned at first into a shocked WTF expression I then burst out laughing!  And laughed all the way back to the car.

 

Arriving home wet and cold - but still feeling good - I knew it could all be fixed with a cup of tea, chocolate cookie and Molly wagging her tail.  Kindness feels good.  

 

The more things change.......

 

Jae and Me circa early 70's - we both still look just like this! (Well maybe not JUST like this.)

"The more things change, the more they stay the same"

 

We've all heard that from one source or another.  I thought when beginning this post the quote was an apt remark to begin with.  Then I decided to find out where it originated.....  Its attributed to a nineteenth century French critic, journalist, novelist and keen flower lover Jean-Baptiste Alphonse Karr.  Wikipedia says his epigrams (which they define as brief, interesting and sometimes surprising or satirical statements) were frequently quoted.  He gave the dahlia plant/flower its name and 'practically founded' the cut flower trade on the French Rivera.  Fascinating.

That isn't what I originally sat down to write about but you know what often happens when you start something on the Internet.  It leads you to something else and then something else.  What a wonderful thing to have so much knowledge - and bull shit - at your fingertips.

Nothing much of note has been happening with us over the past few days.  With one very big exception which was our lunch with friends J & K.  Originally we were planning to have a casual lunch in a harbour side restaurant on Monday - which was the official public holiday for Australia Day.  That was the day that Sydney got hit with it's share of the torrential downpour from the x-cyclone (as the press kept calling it) that had already ravaged Queensland.  We needed rain but - my goodness - we got a month's worth in one day!  So we decided instead to have an impromptu dinner party at their house.  What a great decision that turned out to be!!!  Great food, great wine, and good times with great friends.  We hadn't had such a fun day in a while although we did, however, take a bit of time to get moving the next day.  Neither Mr G nor me is used to quite that level of alcohol any more.

So back to not much going on.  While walking to the gym this morning I was thinking about how much life has changed for me in the past 6 months.  I left work and I'm enjoying it, changed gyms and now motivating myself to train without personal trainers, I'm learning to live frugally on a budget, I'm cooking almost every day and night, reading more and just generally living a lot differently than less than a year ago.  And yet, with all that change, things are pretty much the same ... with the exception that I believe I am becoming more mindful.  When you slow down you really do have the opportunity to appreciate more of what's around you.  In my walk this morning I had a wonderful moment patting a neighbourhood cat I hadn't noticed before - he was so animated and loving!  When I got home the king parrots were outside on the railing and they are getting very tame.  I realised I'm enjoying the little surprising things a lot.  

So there...everything has changed but it's all still the same.  I've just had the opportunity to see it through different eyes.  Nice.

Stairway to Happiness and Australia Day

 

Yesterday was Australia Day and normally Mr G and I share our boat with our friends Jenny and Keith - plus others - for a day of drinking, eating, sailing and more drinking and eating!  But this year Mr G had been talking about sailing the boat to Tasmania - with or without me.  Now, he'll hate me saying this, but I think this plan was a bit of a threat.  You see I've made it quite clear that Tasmania is one place I do not want to go in our little boat - especially with just the two of us sailing it.  Maybe if I miraculously become a calmer, better sailor I will manage it with others aboard.  But, as Dirty Harry once said in the movies, "a man (woman here) has got to know his limitations"....and this woman knows hers very clearly.  Mr G knows if I think he may do something in reality I'll usually give in and go along ... but I wasn't budging on this one.

 

So, because of the stalemate, the plans for our usual Australia Day didn't happen this year although we are meeting J & K for lunch later so we won't miss out on the drinking and eating!

 

Instead, Mr G helped his friend John sail his boat 'Happiness' down to his new mooring in Sydney Harbour.  When he bought it, 'Happiness' came with the single most ornate set of steps leading up to board the boat we have ever seen.  So here's Mr G and John on their departure for the sail to Sydney via the Stairway to Happiness!

 

 



 



I was told it was a terrific sail down.  Me, I went to the movies to see 'Les Miserables' on my own because Mr G flat refuses to see musicals.  I thought the movie was technically terrific and the fact that the actors had to sing their parts in one shot direct to camera was amazing and moving.  But, I wouldn't claim to have enjoyed the two and a half hours.  It was way too depressing, religious and mellow dramatic for my tastes.

 

In spite of having a completely different kind of Australia Day I still absolutely LOVE the day. 

 

A bit of background for my American friends ..... January 26 marks the day that the First Fleet of 11 ships arrived in what is now called Sydney Cove with a shipment of convicts to establish a new colony.  The ships arrived between the 18th and 20th of January 1788.  The British were forced to establish a new colony because they had lost the 13 colonies in North America after the US war of Independence.  First of all they sailed into Botany Bay which was deemed unsatisfactory so Captain Arthur Phillip sailed up to Port Jackson (better known now as Sydney Harbour) and identified an area for the settlement he called Sydney Cove after the then British Home Secretary.  It took several days to get the ships from Botany Bay to Sydney Cove because of bad weather but they finally made it on January 26, 1788.  The rest - as they say - is history. 

 

There is the belief - which some historians refute - that the landing was marked by a huge ORGY when the female convicts were taken ashore and set up in tents.  How's that for a gene pool?  It leaves the puritan forefathers of my US homeland looking rather staid.  I guess that's why Americans tend toward their particular brand of fundamentalism still today.

 

In keeping with the original settlers Australia Day is marked by serious and not-so-serious celebrations.  It's the most popular day to become an Australian citizen...something that Australian's still feel very proud to do ... Welcome New Australians!  There are so many of us - me and Mr G included - that are deeply grateful for the opportunity to live here!  Then, after the formal swearing in and national honours lists the fun begins!   

 



A colourful bunch celebrating on Sydney Harbour. Picture: Sam Ruttynn from The Telegraph

 

From my youth - A Friend Releases His New Book!

I could regale you with reams and reams of - at times - hair AND eye brow raising stories from my twenties.  But I'll save them for another time and another post. 

One of the great friends, characters - and loves - from my early years is Phillip DePoy.  Celebrity magazines call super talented people a 'triple threat'.  Phillip is a multi-layered threat!  A writer, playwright, actor, composer, musician, performer and on top of all that a college professor as well!!!

Our friendship started at lunch time at Georgia State University in the early 70's.  Daily we would see each other on opposing sides of the crosswalk.   He would always smile at me as we passed and I would look straight ahead and try to pretend I was so cool not to notice him (while my heart was just about to burst in my chest).  I thought we'd never speak and then one day I looked up from my work desk (I was secretary to 7 professors at the time) and there he was!  He came to show me he had a story (I think) published in a magazine.  That started a fabulous long friendship.  Phillip always had a wife or girlfriend at the time so our relationship was always as fast friends!  Hummm...there was a time....

Anyway...Yesterday my wonderful, talented, award winning friend released his latest book "December's Thorn".  Its a new chapter in his series featuring Fever Devlin. 

 

 

It can be ordered through Amazon.  Here's the synopsis...   Fever Devilin is an academic with a complicated past and an unusual view of the world. A folklorist by training, he's returned to his family home in Blue Mountain, a small town in the heart of Georgia's Appalachian Mountains, where nothing is ever quite what it seems, and the past is always complicated. Still recovering from a near-death experience, Fever is visited by a woman who claims to be his wife. And she's there to deliver some shocking news: Fever has a son.

His friends don't really believe the woman exists—they think she's another hallucination of a mind still slowly recovering from a long-term coma. Fever's fiancée is torn between being outraged and concerned for his mental health. None of this is helped by the fact that Fever, even in the best of times, has a tendency to see things that others don't and that may not, strictly speaking, exist. But when someone starts shooting very real bullets from a very real rifle in Fever's direction, the one thing that everyone can agree upon is that there's something very deadly going on. All Fever has to do is sort out who is trying to kill him—and why—before they succeed.

I highly recommend it!

And here's the link to Phillip's website...check out all his books!  Phillip DePoy - His works

Blogging course and Work envy

Last night I attended a 'Blogging for Beginners' course at the Australian Writers Centre here in Sydney.  I took the course initially because I'm enjoying writing this blog but also because I don't have the slightest notion about how to make it better or extend my audience.  I was looking for instruction as well as inspiration.

Everything was looking good as all my fellow attendees entered the room....all women with one male exception.  Glancing around the room, and judging all on face value, I could imagine the personal bloggers like myself learning how to better write about food, or their children or shopping.  However, as we went around the room introducing ourselves and saying what we wanted to get out of the course I realised most were there to learn how to promote their business, or publication or money making initiative.

While listening to them talk I started to miss working....I was actually yearning to be working at something - anything.  The feeling kind of ambushed me.  I certainly hadn't thought about it much for weeks...the Christmas holidays, being on the boat and enjoying that summer "down time" mindset had me coasting along.  Then WHAM I suddenly had a reality moment....I must be really "retired".  It was a weird wake up feeling and I'm still not sure how I feel about it.  I certainly enjoy what I'm doing now...but I'm sure this isn't all there is.  I read on someone's CV on 'linkedin' the other day that they are on "Executive Sabbatical".  I think I'll start to think of myself like that instead of retired.  It doesn't sound as permanent.

Anyway, the course was great, informative.... very short though.  I could have asked a million questions but one thing the instructor kept saying is the most important thing is to just get started with blogging and talk to people who blog and read other people's blog.  So expect more of this from me as I attempt to get better and more interesting!  Thanks for sticking with me so far.

Naked men; moving friends and more HEAT!

I haven't blogged for a while (sorry) because (1) we were on the boat and in an Internet black hole and (2) we helped a friend move some furniture. 

Mr G and molly in a roadside stopover.

The furniture move happened yesterday for our friend, Leona, who had her furniture in long term storage.  Taking on her long term dream, Leona took the brave step of moving to Paris to learn and live the French way for awhile.  Returning late in 2012 was tough because it took some time to find a job and, in turn, to really know where she would live.  Now that she's settled in a job in Canberra she wanted to move some of her belongings out of storage and to a friend's farm in the Southern Highlands. 

Mr G, being the good man that he is, offered to move the furniture in his truck so the 3 of us - Molly came along too - drove to the small community of Murulan to the "farm".  I emphasise the word "farm" because I had heard her talk so much about this place and, as you do, had a clear visual picture of it in my mind.  In my imagination the "farm" looked like something out of an old western movie....big old wooden farmhouse, dirt roads, and old wooden fences with worn out buildings all around.   Boy was I surprised to see a modern looking brick home with a newish brick shed with glass sliding doors.  All in all the drive was very enjoyable, pretty scenery and something different to do for the day. 

Naked men - What?  When we were on the boat last week we moored in a spot we don't usually go to...America Bay.  It's still in the Ku-ring-gai National Park and just around from our usual spot in Refuge Bay near the waterfall (or the fountain of youth as my friend Donna named it).  It was late in the afternoon, Mr G was reading in the boat and I was sitting in the cockpit peering at the cliff and woods through the binoculars looking for birds.  Much to my surprise I saw this man standing up on a cliff top looking out over the bay completely starkers - Naked - just standing there enjoying the fresh air.  He was too far away for a photo or I would show you exactly what I saw! Well you can imagine I kept the binoculars on him for some time.  There is a bush walk that goes down to that area so I suppose he was there to take in the sun and some isolation but he must have thought the 10 or so boats in the bay below could see him.  Guess he didn't care...I applaud his sense of freedom!  The things you see when you just take the time to have a good look around!

Finally I have to mention the record setting HOT day we had on Friday.  It was 45.8 C (well over 110 F) here in Sydney - a record.  That day was unbearable.  We got to our mooring at Claireville Beach about 9:30 Friday morning and by the time we had cleaned up and made it to the beach it was already in the mid 30s.  By the time we got back to the house it was 40 C and it kept going.   It hit 45 just in our backyard - in the shade!  We did get relief in the form of a southerly change that blew in about 8:30 that night.  It has stayed cool this weekend - thank goodness.  There are still so many fires burning all over Australia and so many people and animals have lost their homes... it is very sad and tragic.  We are certainly getting the summer from HELL this year.

Done, finished, thank goodness that's over with!

Boat yard chic.

Oh what a glamorous 3 day weekend I've had working side by side with Mr G to scrape, strip, clean, paint and polish Southern Belle!  It's only when you have to work down one side of the boat - all 42 feet - and then start all over again on the other side that you/we realise just how big this dream boat of ours really is....84 feet to do all that work!

As you can see from my attire not only did I have the obligatory hat and sunnies but I also had the additional, and so very lovely, white face mask in place. This mask is a must to keep the toxic anti-foul paint out of throat and lungs. 



Mr G rolling on the paint.

Saturday was hard.  The weather was in the high 30s (HOT) and sunny....I added about a gazillion more freckles during the day.  Heaven arrived about 3:30 in the form of a southerly change which brought a welcome cloud cover and some sprinkles of rain.

When we got home on Saturday night I didn't have the strength to blog.  But I did write to Jae about how I felt...... What a day! We've just arrived home...both of us barely able to walk. Mr G's back is really hurting.

Wouldn't it be nice if we lived in Downton Abbey...or lived like them for days like this. To have someone peel the sweaty, grimy, dirty clothes off you...run your bath ... scrub your aching body and then dress you in something clean that smells nice (the boat yard smells of paint and thinners and waxing paste - and I wore a paper mask all day). AND THEN....when you have a lovely chilled wine in your hand they come and say, "dinner is served m'lady". I want staff.

 

Sunday wasn't supposed to be as hard - Mr G promised - but it was still really busy.  The weather was nice and cool and cloudy.  On Saturday I had polished the entire boat - all 84 feet.  Sunday was buffing that off.  Not easy for me.  I just couldn't hold the buffer hard enough against the hull.  Mr G - bless him - did most of that while I hand buffed the bow section where the boat name was.  Then we had to put the final coat of anti-foul paint on and then finally wax and hand buff the entire water line - which was my job.

 

I can honestly say that my dedication to the gym all these years paid off this weekend.   The work, combined with moving and climbing on and off scaffolding, would have killed me if I wasn't relatively fit.  Oh and one more thing...I was the only woman at the boat yard.  We got several comments from the men there that their wives, "wouldn't be caught dead doing this".  That gave me a strange sense of pride that I was there doing my share...even with the heat, smell and grime .... I was proud of myself for being equal to the guys.  Misplaced?  Maybe.

 

Anyway, we finished on Sunday about 4:30 just before the sky opened up and we had our best rain since Christmas Day.  Whew....just in time.  Monday morning we were booked in to go back into the water at 7:30am.  The boat looks fantastic.  Done, finished and we don't have to go through that again for at least 18 months to 2 years.

 

All clean and beautiful and headed for the water.